Eight years ago this past February, I stumbled upon
AbsolutePunk.net while scouring the internet for Butch Walker b-sides. By this
point, I'd probably visited the website a few times for various pieces of
news—my favorite artists list did include
Jimmy Eat World and Jack's Mannequin, after all—but on that day in February
2008, I finally took the plunge and set up an account. Excuse the cliché, but
little did I know that I'd just made a decision that would change my life in
countless incredible ways.
AbsolutePunk.net (or AP.net, as we call it around the
forums) has meant different things to me at different times over the course of
the last eight years. At first, it was little more than a source for b-sides
and rare bonus tracks. The b-sides thread in the General forum was my main
haunt—if not my only one. Then, it was my place to ruffle feathers and blow off
steam online. I can't much fault the many trolls I have argued with and banned
from the site over the years, because I used to be one of them.
But then, slowly, AbsolutePunk started to become my
"home" online. It became the first site I hit every day when I came
home from school, and the site I hung around in the evenings. Whether I was
looking for new music, trying to find out about leaks, or chatting about
longtime favorite bands and albums, AP.net became the ultimate outlet for my
music obsession. I'd been a ravenous music fan since 2004, but most of my
friends in real life didn't share the passion. That's not to say my best buds
listened to bad music, but it was
rare for me to have long, in-depth conversations about records or artists with
friends, or to trade mixtapes or recommendations with people at school. Aside
from my brother, there weren't many people in my life who followed music with
the furor I did. That situation meant it was incredibly fulfilling and personal
when I'd discover a new album that blew my mind, but it was also a solitary
place to be.
AbsolutePunk gave me a way to talk to a whole slew of people
who adored music as much as I did. These people were passionate about the same
artists I was; they connected to music in the same visceral way that I did; and
perhaps most importantly, they knew about artists and bands that I'd never even
heard of. To say that hanging out on
the forums at AP.net introduced me to a lot of new music would be an
understatement. To give just a few examples, people on this site turned me on
to (in rough chronological order) The Gaslight Anthem, Valencia, Copeland, Bon Iver, The
New Frontiers, Lydia, The Damnwells, The Dangerous Summer, Cary Brothers, Chad
Perrone, Charlie Simpson, Jason Isbell, The 1975, Kacey Musgraves, The
Hotelier, Noah Gundersen, and Chris Stapleton. For anyone who knows me, has
heard one of my playlists, or has read any of my writing over the past several
years, just seeing the artists on that list should be enough to convey what
this site meant to me. Perhaps more impressively, that list barely scratches the
surface of the music I discovered on AbsolutePunk.
Eventually, AbsolutePunk evolved into something else for me.
I posted on this site every day throughout college (even the day after I bombed out of my college major), always reading the reviews
or chatting about Springsteen or JEW with other users. It was my place to write
about music before I was really a writer at all. And then once I did start blogging, the forums were
always one of the first places I would go to share my work. I did that for a
year, from the summer of 2011 to the summer of 2012, slowly becoming more
confident in myself and the words I wrote. It was always a treat to be bolstered along by
compliments and thoughtful conversation from the people on this site.
Then, one day in July 2012, I posted a review of The
Gaslight Anthem's Handwritten on my
blog. As was customary by then, I quickly went over to the forums and dropped a
link to the review in the official album thread. I didn't expect anything to
come of it: the site already had a Handwritten
review by then (shout out to Thomas Nassiff's 10.0 endorsement) and I was
mostly aiming to continue the emphatic discussion about the record that I'd
already been having with other users on the site.
But when I logged on to AP.net later that afternoon—at work,
no less; always the slacker—I had a private message in my inbox titled with
three simple words: "Contributing to AP." The message, sent by
one-time staff member Matthew Tsai, was short and sweet: "Hey! I passed on your
Gaslight review to some of the staff and a lot of us really dig how you write.
Jason was wondering if you'd be interested in coming on staff and writing for
us. Let me know!" I didn't need to think for more than a split second before typing out that, yes, I would be interested.
I
could say "and then the rest was history" at this point, but I don't
think that line would do justice to what writing for AbsolutePunk.net did for
me, both personally and professionally. As fate would have it, I'd just
switched my college major to professional writing (from classical voice) and
reviewing records on AbsolutePunk was the perfect complement to that academic
pursuit. Working for the site gave me an edge over my fellow students—not just
in terms of resume, but also in that I had a chance to take all of the writing
habits I was learning in the classroom and employ them in a practical
environment. I progressed so quickly as a writer during my two semesters of
senior year, and while a part of that has to be owed to my great professors,
perhaps a bigger part was owed to this website.
Indeed,
AbsolutePunk was the perfect place to
develop my voice as a writer. Instead of being pinned down by assignments, I
had the freedom to decide what I wanted to write about. Instead of dealing with
deadlines, I could work projects on my own time and hone my reviews until they
were precisely where I wanted them to be. Instead of being held to some
bullshit standard of objectivity, I could be as blatantly personal and
subjective as I wanted in my writing. Other publications around the internet
might have had "better" writing or more "prestige" than we did
at AbsolutePunk, but I fully believe that our staff consisted of the most honest
and passionate music writers on the internet. And artists noticed.
I love @AbsolutePunk. They like some albums & don’t like others but they always treat MUSIC like something they LOVE http://t.co/g2UFd54nSo— Counting Crows (@CountingCrows) September 3, 2014
Writing
for AbsolutePunk taught me how to stay motivated and govern the quality,
approach, and scope of my writing on my own terms—skills that have served me
well in my current role as work-from-home freelance writer. More than that,
though, writing for AP.net taught me to love music more deeply and not to be
afraid of sharing those emotional connections with other people. Over the
course of three and a half years as a staff member, I wrote 200 reviews (on the
dot) and contributed dozens of other articles and features. The best of
those—and the ones that tended to get the biggest response from readers—were
the ones where I took the site's mantra of "Music Mends Broken
Hearts" to…well, to heart. I spilled my exhilaration and fear about
graduating college in pieces about Jimmy Eat World's Damage and Bruce Springsteen's The Wild, The Innocent, The E Street Shuffle; I reflected on past heartache
every time I wrote about City and Colour; I went full fanboy and reviewed every single Butch Walker album in the span of a week; I talked about the
life-changing power of music and mourned
the loss of my grandfather in a retrospective piece about Jimmy Eat World's
Futures; I talked about falling in love with my wife in my 10-year retrospective for Jack's Mannequin's Everything in Transit; I wrote myself to
tears talking about how Born to Run had acted like a "hidden map of life" during my coming-of-age years; and
I waxed poetic about learning life's big lessons not in the classroom, but at Bruce Springsteen's live shows. These pieces were incredibly special to me, and
it was nothing short of life affirming to see that they were special to other
people as well.
Reviews
weren't the only thing that made being an AbsolutePunk staff member amazing,
either. Everything from getting albums months early to shooting the shit with
other staff in Slack to chatting with my favorite artists made this job a joy.
How many people get to spend hours picking their heroes' brains about music?
The remarkably in-depth conversations I had with Chris Carrabba, Chad Perrone,
Brian Fallon, Noah Gundersen, Jason Isbell, Matt Nathanson, and Donovan Woods
taught me more about songwriting and the musical art than two and a half years
in music school combined. Suffice to say that those conversations played a big
role in getting me to a place where I was ready to write and record my own album. More on that later.
And
how poetic is it that, almost exactly seven years after I found AbsolutePunk
while digging around for Butch Walker b-sides, Butch Walker himself called me
up for an hour-long telephone conversation? That interview, about Butch's
masterful 2015 release Afraid of Ghosts,
is the kind of career highlight that I'm not sure I'll ever top. How can you
beat a candid conversation with a guy you've worshipped since before puberty?
How can you top an interview that comes together not because of a publicist,
but because your hero reads your tweet, recognizes your name, and replies back
"Dude, I'll do an interview with you!" Even getting your review retweeted
by Taylor Swift can't quite rival that.
— absolutepunk (@absolutepunk) September 22, 2015
That's
the thing about AbsolutePunk. We never necessarily did things by the book or
the way that other publications did. In a lot of ways, we were amateurs. But
when it comes to loving music, there's no such thing as being a professional.
This place, from the forums to the staff all the way up to Jason Tate himself,
was always a bastion of musical adoration the likes of which you couldn't find
anywhere else on the internet. Now, the sun is setting on that bastion.
Countless broken hearts have been mended by music and by the supportive
community that AbsolutePunk offered, and now, it's time for the next adventure.
Mission accomplished. Mischief managed.
As
Jason said in his lengthy farewell post to AbsolutePunk, this ending is not a goodbye; rather, it's the end of one
chapter and the start of another—the start of one that, hopefully, will be even
better. When Jason first showed me Chorus.fm in January and told me about his
plans to "sunset" AP.net in favor of the new site, part of me was hit
with the realization that something I had loved was ending. But another
part—perhaps a bigger part—was excited about the future. I have never seen
Jason as excited or as passionate as he has been in the run-up to Chorus. Since
AbsolutePunk built its brand on passion, it's only logical that the next site
would start there too.
Still,
there are things I'll miss about AP.net. I'll miss calling myself a Senior
Editor of a major music publication. I'll miss organizing massive site
features, like our staff-combined year-end lists. I'll miss going back and
sorting through all of the content I wrote over there (though I've reposted almost everything here on this blog). But
hey, at least I got a poetic ending. Last month, I posted my 200th
and final album review on the website, of Brian Fallon's new solo album, Painkillers. Since I got hired to the
site for writing about Fallon's main project, The Gaslight Anthem, closing out
with another review of his work was a
nice coming-full-circle moment for me. Now, I'm ready for what's next: the next
review; the next interview; the next EOTY list where I write way too many words
about the albums I loved; the next discovery on the forums; hopefully not the next kid telling us that it's
AbsolutePUNK not AbsoluteSomeGenreOtherThankPunk.
But
before we get to that, I would be remiss if I didn't cast one last look back on
the entity that shaped my writing more than any other, or give one last thank
you to all of the people who made it worth it. To everyone who ever read and
enjoyed my reviews, challenged my way of thinking about music, recommended
artists, or worked alongside me—thank you. You know who you are. Thanks
especially to Jason Tate for the myriad of amazing opportunities this site has
given me. You'll probably be hearing a lot of thank-you's to Jason over the
next few days, and it's not hard to see why: AbsolutePunk.net was the place
where many of us grew up and found our voices. Here's hoping there's some kid out there who will be able to let Chorus.fm do what AbsolutePunk.net did for me.
Some (Almost) Final Statistics:
Why is there no "Minutes wasted arguing with fellow users" section? |
I wish I had a total review word count here, because I'm sure it's just ridiculous. |
My Final Post: